Writing down my journey..

When i saw you, i have so many things that i want to say, yet i became speechless. My schedules are pretty bombarded with school attachment , thought that being located at giordano shop for half shift attachment is a good thing. But it is the worst MSC stopover in terms of time consuming. When it is half shift, it is supposed to be half day. But.. It has been taking up more than that. For the last whole week, we were doing full shift from 9 to 5.30 with external trainings and trainings when we are supposed to be working like 9 to 1.30 only. Furthermore, for the past 2 days, the school put us to external giordano outlet and they say its only half day there, but their half day is 7.5 hours. oh my.. I really have no idea what does this got to do with my course and specialisation. I am in Human Resource and not Customer Service. Train to become a retail assistant at giordano? Like as if we never did any part time job before. Somemore, this is totally free labour and it affects my grade.

The soft goodbye. I started with a goodbye and I will end with a goodbye. I will pick up from where i fell. It has been about 2 years since i created this blog. I went back to read at my blog's first month posts. Many feelings go through in my head. First thinking was... childish. Looking back 2 years ago, I was preparing my o levels and emoing about my lost relationship. Now, I am not preparing my o levels but i am still emoing about my lost relationship. Dont you think it is foolish? 2 years seems to pass in just a glance but it seems like i have not develop myself much. Am i going to continue my life like this? emoing about the lost relationship? Sometimes i ask myself why i cant express my feelings freely and loudly. Because i dont know myself well, i am not loving myself enough. Sometimes i have gave my best, but the result wasnt what i wanted, i cant blame myself because it is just that i am not good enough to seize the opportunity to the fullest at that moment. From today on

searching for my answer, finding my dream. Spending most of the time thinking of some unwanted stuffs is really annoying. Am i going to spend the rest of my life thinking about it? Or am i going to put it aside and focus on my dream? I will need to act on what i decide. Sometimes i find myself really contradicting, I know what to do is right yet i am not acting the way that i should. From today onwards, i have got to think and act the same way to be truthful to myself, i do not want to hurt myself anymore. If i am going to see the rainbow, I got to go stand the rain.

What dreams may come by. "Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly." 14 Aug friday marks my last day at BSC attachment. It has been a journey that we initially had lots of fun, having plenty of time to play childhood games in the room, facebooking, and more. I thought the stopover was a joke until 4 weeks passed and more projects started to bombard on us. We became more work-focused and had to adapt to a faster pace work environment compared to the 1st four weeks yet we were still able to find fun in it. 9 weeks, we shared work, stress, joy and laughter. Time passes pretty fast. Looking back when we first met till the last day, i have found myself growing more responsible. Thats the end of BSC and now, i am looking forward to move on to the next stopover at MSC (Marketing Services Centre).

I opened my eyes last night and saw you in the low light. Personal Selling Report is done but I am behind schedule because I have not started on my Summary Report yet. Gosh. Prolly i wont be going to school tomorrow so that i can use that extra few hours to do it at home. I seems to lose focus easily when i am doing reports. I always check back on my msn, thinking about one stuff. Also, started playing with my keyboard which is just one finger away from my laptop. Grr.. I need to stop all these and be on task totally for the next 3 days. Jia you Alex! You were my motivation, Now you arent there anymore, I am on my own.

My makeup on with a xiao mei mei. What a day. It was insane, having hundreds of eyes staring at me ever since i stepped out the art museum. Reason: I had my whole face painted red & white in celebration for the national day. Went out with the WHAT WHAT people to celebrate national days and watched the beautiful fireworks although my reports are not yet done. We went down to Singapore Art Museum and had our face painted with things that represents singapore. Most of them got their cheek painted and i got my whole face painted of a singapore flag. Of course, you would then expect people staring at me, and some random people taking pictures of us & with us. It was totally crazy. Many feelings were running through my head - Embarrased? Irritated? Happy? and even times when i want to go home asap. Route that i took today: Singapore Art Museum->Suntec City->Marina Square->Hong Kong Cafe->Flyer->Marina Square->City Link->MRT->Toa Payoh. Imagine walking through

Looking things at different perspectives, gives different thinkings and solutions. I have 2 reports to do currently for my attachment. One is summary report, where i will sum up all the things i have learnt and another report is on the personal selling. Not really started on it yet. I am worrying. Just a feeling of fear and worried that i may not be able to hand it on time. Don't really like this feeling of last minute work cos i don't feel 100% safe in this situation. Let me plan when i can get this done asap... Tomorrow morning - Personal selling report Monday morning - Summary report Monday night - Summary report Tuesday night - Finalised Wednesday - Print Thursday - Submission Okay. Thinking of attachment, it just makes me feel worried on the mystery shopping report that we are working on. We are left with 3 days - tues, wed, thurs to get it done. At the same time, we are working on another report which needs some touch up before finalising it. One more thing is that we sti

Once upon a time... Finally a break. Its time off from attachment for today cos of the extra hours i have worked for the past weekends. And... what a break. I spent the whole day at home. Did some piano score findings of the myth endless love song. There are a couple of versions of it, so was listening to different versions and see which one is reasonable for my level. Just nice, my printer is low on ink, so without the score i couldnt start learning yet. Also, took out my dusty guitar from the storeroom which i bought it when i was 11. So.. i havent been touching it for very long time, cos i know nth about music when i was a p5 kid. Went online to look at some beginner guides on guitar and started playing some chords. Erm, no idea why i am starting to like to play more instruments recently. Developing the likes of acoustic guitar, bass guitar and drum. Thinking of learning one of these instrument and gather pple to form a band. Had this thinking - if not now as a teenager, i may not h

These mountains tells me ... simply alot that i am unable to describe. I just finished watching this show, The Myth - 神话 again. A 2005 movie, watched it a couple of times already cos i bought the cheap cheap dvd when i went to china in sec 2. This show is the best movie i have ever watched and the reason why i watched over and over again and never getting sick of it. I myself, i love movies that has the Qing Dynasty or those chinese history chracters like liu bei, cao cao all that. So this movie is not an exceptional. I will strongly recommend everyone to get a dvd and watch this if you love chinese fantasy movies. If you want, you can get it from me (: The theme song of the show - 神话 (Endless Love) 解开我 最神秘的等待 星星坠落 风在吹动 终於再将你拥入怀中 两颗心 颤抖 相信我 不变的真心千年等待有我承诺 无论经过多少的寒冬 我绝不放手 现在紧抓住我的手闭上眼睛 请你回想起过去我们恋爱的日子 我们是因为太爱 所以更使得我们痛苦 我们连「爱你」这一句话都无法讲 每一夜 被心痛穿越 思念永没有终点 早习惯了孤独相随 我微笑面对 相信我 你选择等待 再多苦痛也不闪躲 只有你的温柔能解救 无边的冷漠 现在紧抓住我的手闭上眼睛 请你回想起过去我们恋爱的日子 我们是因为太爱 所以更使得我们痛苦 我们连「爱你」这一句话都无法讲 让爱成为你我心中 那永远盛开的花 穿越时空绝不低头

So lovely as always. Its the season once again for alex to go shopping. Normally i shop for clothes every 6 months basis, it may sound stupid but bo bian, though i will buy alot when i really do buy. And still, my cute little mama will start nagging at how spendthrift i am. Sigh... Went bugis street with weisin today. Gotten myself 5 shirts, 3 pants and 1 cap. Together more than 120 bucks. With another shirt i bought yesterday at suntec @ man studio that cost me 55 bucks. Still, i am left with.. - Colour plain shirts - Adidas NBA All-Star Reversible Jacket - Socks - Belt But i will put this on hold first and slowly buy it with my monthly income and savings (: Also, my school has a couple of h1n1 cases and some comes from the same stopover attachment as me. Most of the teams at BSC now is closed down and working at home. So everyone take good care of yourself and stay healthy :D I cut my hair again ><

I still remember the promise - River flows in you. I read my archives from this year jan to april. Mixed feelings now. I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do is right. I need some guidance. When i met with obstacle in mar-apr, i chose to run away. I feel regretful, how much i worked hard to gain back, but lost it because of my foolish thoughts once again. And once again, its cos of my foolishness. However, another thought tells me that it is a blessing in disguise and i shouldnt blame myself totally because it wasnt an individual effort thing. If that did not happen, would my life still be what it is now? It tells me, it is just a puppy love. Again, I just cant stop thinking of the 6 letters daily. If you ask me why i love her. I can say i have no idea. Its just so strange that her eyes tells me she is the one. See... thats why i say i am having mixed feelings now. I have been pushing myself really hard even to the extent to flirt and thinking of to start a new rela